Good Advice

Good Advice

1. Take a 10-30 minute walk every day. And while you walk, smile. It is the ultimate anti-depressant.--Plus if you smile while you are walking, it makes people wonder what’s on your mind or what you are listening to through your headphones.
2. Sit in silence for at least 10 minutes each day. Buy a lock if you have to.--You don’t have to buy a lock, just put duct tape on your man’s mouth.
3. When you wake up in the morning complete the following statement, 'My purpose is to __________ today.'--You’ll know if your man has read this if he’s trying real hard to get some.
4. Eat more foods that grow on trees and plants and eat less food that is manufactured in plants.—McCain’s Tater Tots combine the best of both worlds and you are supporting the Prince Edward Island potato industry
5. Drink green tea and plenty of water. Eat blueberries, wild Alaskan salmon, broccoli , almonds & walnuts.—Wild Alaskan salmon is Wild Vancouver Island Salmon that has swum further up the Pacific Ocean.
6. Try to make at least three people smile each day.—I always like to make Me, Myself and I smile.
7. Don't waste your precious energy on gossip, energy vampires, issues of the past, negative thoughts or things you cannot control. Instead, invest your energy in the positive present moment.—Great, now men who don’t like their mother-in-law have a perfect reason for avoiding her.
8. Eat breakfast like a king, lunch like a prince and dinner like a college kid with a maxed out charge card.—That's why if you want to get hit on by a college boy, go to a bar that has free appetizers during Happy Hour.
9. Life isn't fair, but it's still good.—My Mama always said Life Isn’t fair, Life isn’t unfair, Life just is.
11. Don't take yourself so seriously. No one else does.—Or as my best gal pal likes to say “Dance like no one is looking”.
12. You don't have to win every argument. Agree to disagree.—The Klingons also have a saying: Revenge is a dish best served cold.
13. Make peace with your past so it won't spoil the present.—Plus when you make peace with the past, it can get you a nice sucking up present.
14. Don't compare your life to others'. You have no idea what their journey is all about.—I’m not perfect but I’m Canadian and that’s good enough for me.
15. No one is in charge of your happiness except you.—The lower bowl Flames versus Oilers hockey tickets that Big Lug’s boss gave him has definitely charged up my happiness and it’s not even 10 a.m.
16. Frame every so-called disaster with these words: 'In five years, will this matter?'—RIP Dale. Your NASCAR legacy lives on. Scott Phillips, thanks for keeping Allan Jackson's "Where Were You?" on Country 105's playlist.
17. Forgive everyone for everything.—To put this into Redneck speak, What goes around comes around.
18. What other people think of you is none of your business.—If you are going to follow #1, #4, #7, #8 and #11, this one will become law, not just a casual suggestion.
19. GOD heals everything.—AMEN!!!!!!!!!!
20. However good or bad a situation is, it will change. If you are having trouble believing that, reread #19 five times
21. Your job won't take care of you when you are sick. Your friends will. Stay in touch!!!—That’s why #17 is very important.
22. Envy is a waste of time. You already have all you need.—I walk two blocks one way, I’m in an assisted rent complex. I walk two blocks a different direction, I’m in a section where a cheap house is $750,000. If all three of us walk five blocks together, we’ve got a great view of the mountains. Life is good.
23. Each night before you go to bed complete the following statements: I am thankful for __________.—giving in to my husband’s attempts to get some. Prairie redneck women aren’t ashamed to admit they like to try to get some. It’s just not the be all, end all of their thought process.
24. Today I accomplished _________.—Stoking Corney’s ego. You go GIRL!
25. Remember that you are too blessed to be stressed.

Proverbs 3:1-2 Forget not my law, but let your heart keep my commandments; for length of days, and long life, and peace, shall they add to you.